He goes on about a load of boring stuff. He should sing about me. They could make a film of my life and it would be amazing. I visited France before anyone else I know. My parents had a bottle of red wine at Sunday dinner. We had records by Mantovani and Daddy wore a cravat. Mummy met Princess Michael of Kent and I held a position with a finance house in Swindon before moving to Eastbourne.
I love laughing uproarious with members of ethnic minorities to show how accepting and inclusive I am. I hope to leave them remembering my kindness and liveability.
But I am also on an emotional roller coaster seething with unspoken emotional feelings after watching Big Brother and seeing the photos of loved ones. The heart-wrenching sense of loss felt by the contestants made me weep in empathy. These people have not seen their nearest and dearest for seven, YES - 7 days. Just let that sink in. How would you feel if you hadn't seen your Aintie Jill for 7 days of devastation. Bless.
That's nothing. I had spent 2 months looking forward to merging fruit on the ferry from Portsmouth to Jersey with Gertie and Jim. The voyage was cancelled because they would let Pip on board.
There is a street in Inverness with a very interesting name. It is Avenida de Las Limas Tresas and it got it's name from a visit by the Duke of Gonzarga to the Highlands in search of a wife from one of the powerful Highland clans. In the end he married Isabella Grant of Grant and in memory of the happy event the Duke planted two rows of 12 lime trees on the outskirts of Inverness. As a reciprocal measure, Isabella's father Patrick Mor sent 24 beech trees to the Duke's estate in Navarra where they remain to this day.
That's quite interesting but here's a fascinating story of my own. Whenever I'm doing a deep clean of the cutlery drawer, I alway hope to find miniature versions of Michael Buble and Ed Sheering singing the top hits. But I never do.
There's too many adverts on tv with foreign looking people in them. That shower in the chocolate advert look French and theirs a Swedish man advertising beet. Is the no English people left?
I love talking about interesting things in a dreary voice. I speak in a kind of droning whine like the novelty MP from Buchan. I can't remember his name but I think he likes watching videos.
So me and my first wife lived next door to Stevie Wonder and his wife for 2 years. I couldn't stick him. How often do you have to reinvent yourself, I asked him after he went round the neighborhood shoving little printed cards in all our mailboxes telling everyone he had been appointed as Head of Creative Development at MGM. Like who cares? Live with the fact that your life has been a disaster.
I'm lots of fun. Except when people tell sad stories about face-masks going wrong or things to do with unlucky people. 😕 Then my busy little face looks sad 😔.
It makes me want to vomit in my shoes when you get these people and they say Oh I'll be your friend and then it turns out there friendly with other people. Sickens me
I know. It twists my nutmeg when people pretend there you're friends at bingo then they won't speak to you on the bus or the chiipy. They are Bhutanese skysh as some one one's said.
Two things to report today. Briefly. Or "in short" as his nibs likes to say. 1. I love it when someone gives the "thumbs up" sign on TV. It just shows what we can achieve when we put our minds to it. The British Bulldog spirit that saw us through the Blitz when England stood alone. 2. I have bought tickets for the snooker extravaganza at the Crucible. At a vital point in the game when the audience is silent I am going to scream like the lady in the shower in "Psycho". It's another very British thing to do. Like talking to someone in a queue at a supermarket checkout 🙄
That's fabulous Friends! Do it!! I've started a new thing recently. I sit on the bus next to a stranger [preferably an elderly lady] and I start muttering under my breath, cursing and swaring and saying things like " I'm going to make you suffer Nicolas Witchell. Yes you are an effing witch. I'm going to get you." Then I turn to the lady and smile like a real gentleman and comment on the weather and mention my charitable works at the hospice. Then I start the muttering again. Things like "You make me sick Adele with your carry-on and your folders. And more of it and it's curtains for you you effing b****g". Then I ask the passenger if she would like to accompany me to the nearest Wotherspoons for a slice of banana liaf and an afternoon of oompahpah in a quiet corner. To date I have had few acceptances and no arrests. Snatch!
He goes on about a load of boring stuff. He should sing about me. They could make a film of my life and it would be amazing. I visited France before anyone else I know. My parents had a bottle of red wine at Sunday dinner. We had records by Mantovani and Daddy wore a cravat. Mummy met Princess Michael of Kent and I held a position with a finance house in Swindon before moving to Eastbourne.
ReplyDeleteHas anybody ever said "That Hugh Melby's a lady man." If not why not.
DeleteI love laughing uproarious with members of ethnic minorities to show how accepting and inclusive I am. I hope to leave them remembering my kindness and liveability.
DeleteBut I am also on an emotional roller coaster seething with unspoken emotional feelings after watching Big Brother and seeing the photos of loved ones. The heart-wrenching sense of loss felt by the contestants made me weep in empathy. These people have not seen their nearest and dearest for seven, YES - 7 days. Just let that sink in. How would you feel if you hadn't seen your Aintie Jill for 7 days of devastation. Bless.
DeleteThat's nothing. I had spent 2 months looking forward to merging fruit on the ferry from Portsmouth to Jersey with Gertie and Jim. The voyage was cancelled because they would let Pip on board.
DeleteShe said she'd buy us three each of them but we never even saw one. Typical.
DeleteI'm not sure what I'd say to Jennifer Anniston if I met her at a Meat Is Murder rally.
Delete4452961.mubb
DeleteThere is a street in Inverness with a very interesting name. It is Avenida de Las Limas Tresas and it got it's name from a visit by the Duke of Gonzarga to the Highlands in search of a wife from one of the powerful Highland clans. In the end he married Isabella Grant of Grant and in memory of the happy event the Duke planted two rows of 12 lime trees on the outskirts of Inverness. As a reciprocal measure, Isabella's father Patrick Mor sent 24 beech trees to the Duke's estate in Navarra where they remain to this day.
ReplyDeleteThat's quite interesting but here's a fascinating story of my own. Whenever I'm doing a deep clean of the cutlery drawer, I alway hope to find miniature versions of Michael Buble and Ed Sheering singing the top hits. But I never do.
DeleteA miniature version of Scottish actress Renee Houston used to live in our China cabinet.
DeleteThere's too many adverts on tv with foreign looking people in them. That shower in the chocolate advert look French and theirs a Swedish man advertising beet. Is the no English people left?
DeleteI've been round the block and i ain't going down dat Road again bwana. If I offer people and f*ckfi lift they'll get s f*#kin lift. OK cheif
DeleteI love talking about interesting things in a dreary voice. I speak in a kind of droning whine like the novelty MP from Buchan. I can't remember his name but I think he likes watching videos.
ReplyDeleteSo me and my first wife lived next door to Stevie Wonder and his wife for 2 years. I couldn't stick him. How often do you have to reinvent yourself, I asked him after he went round the neighborhood shoving little printed cards in all our mailboxes telling everyone he had been appointed as Head of Creative Development at MGM. Like who cares? Live with the fact that your life has been a disaster.
DeleteI'm lots of fun. Except when people tell sad stories about face-masks going wrong or things to do with unlucky people. 😕 Then my busy little face looks sad 😔.
DeleteIt makes me want to vomit in my shoes when you get these people and they say Oh I'll be your friend and then it turns out there friendly with other people. Sickens me
ReplyDeleteI know. It twists my nutmeg when people pretend there you're friends at bingo then they won't speak to you on the bus or the chiipy. They are Bhutanese skysh as some one one's said.
DeleteI've got a new word I'm going to call people when I'm livid. I'm going to say Shut your effing mouth you shadwick.
DeleteIf I entered the Artemis Bar in Cambridge dressed as a newt no-one would notice.
DeleteLooks like Sir Kier Starmer is going to have to bury the pilchard. Again.
ReplyDeleteYes but you can't get into Amrca, Trkey or Blgim if your a cmmnist
DeleteTwo things to report today. Briefly. Or "in short" as his nibs likes to say.
Delete1. I love it when someone gives the "thumbs up" sign on TV. It just shows what we can achieve when we put our minds to it. The British Bulldog spirit that saw us through the Blitz when England stood alone.
2. I have bought tickets for the snooker extravaganza at the Crucible. At a vital point in the game when the audience is silent I am going to scream like the lady in the shower in "Psycho". It's another very British thing to do. Like talking to someone in a queue at a supermarket checkout 🙄
That's fabulous Friends! Do it!! I've started a new thing recently. I sit on the bus next to a stranger [preferably an elderly lady] and I start muttering under my breath, cursing and swaring and saying things like " I'm going to make you suffer Nicolas Witchell. Yes you are an effing witch. I'm going to get you." Then I turn to the lady and smile like a real gentleman and comment on the weather and mention my charitable works at the hospice. Then I start the muttering again. Things like "You make me sick Adele with your carry-on and your folders. And more of it and it's curtains for you you effing b****g". Then I ask the passenger if she would like to accompany me to the nearest Wotherspoons for a slice of banana liaf and an afternoon of oompahpah in a quiet corner. To date I have had few acceptances and no arrests. Snatch!
Delete